Ordinary things

About one year ago I decided that I wanted to do something to help my grandbabies, Jayden and Brooklyn.  I wanted be able to give towards a house that our family wanted to help them build.  I had an idea to make a necklace using a scrabble tile.  I remember praying and asking God to use this idea to help me raise $1000 dollars to give towards building them a new home. I only asked for $1000, but God had a different plan.   God began to work in me.  He took this little idea and he multiplied it over and over.  To this date I have raised $7000.00.  Not only did God bless this idea, he multiplied it over and over again.  I'm still raising money and it's not over yet.  I realized something the last few weeks, that God is not stopped by our ordinariness, circumstances, problems or our dilemnas.  When given to Him, He can do abundantly above all that we can ask or think.  He has done that this past year.  I'm glad that God reminded me.  He says "stop and listen to your heart, Joan.  I'm speaking to you, I'm using what you have, you don't have to have a lot when I'm in it.  I use ordinary things and people.  I'm not stopped by circumstances or by your sin, or by your disobedience.  I'm not stopped by your struggles or pain.  I'm not stopped by broken things.  I'm not stopped!"  As I have leaned in to grace this past year, He keeps reminding me to give Him what I have.  Whatever that is, even if it's just a scrabble tile!   

Jayden's smile!

Today I looked into my grandson Jayden’s eyes, they were smiling.  I loved that moment.  You see Jayden can’t talk.  Unfortunately, Sanfilippo has taken that away.  So I look for moments to peer into his soul.  I grasp the moments, and with everything I have, I try and capture that smile in my memory.  I would love to bottle it up for later.  There’s something about a little boy who is full of life and activity, yet can’t communicate with words.   But Jayden has learned to communicate with his eyes.  At least that’s how I see it.  He has a gift that he gives to people who know him.  He lights up a room when he smiles.  His beautiful smile has a shine to it.  He shines his way into our hearts every day.  I know that is directly from the Lord.   In fact, God often uses Jayden to teach me.  He allows me to see Himself through the eyes and charm of a little boy named Jayden.  Trying to understand Sanfilippo is like trying to understand the mind of God.  I know that it’s not possible.  But instead I want to thank the one who gives life.  The life that God gives is sometimes not the one that we thought we’d have.  But sometimes it’s better. 

John 10:10
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.

Abundant life.....it does look different, it's beyond measure!  It's beyond our understanding! 

Finding grace !

I am amazed every day, that God continues to show up in our lives.  I want nothing more than to see God at work.  I'm thankful that God has restored my eye sight to see Him more clearly.  He's allowed me to see life through the lens of Sanfilippo.  It's not the lens that I thought I'd be looking through.  But I'm thankful everyday that He allows me to see Himself so beautifully through my grandbabies lives.  I'm blessed that God would take such great measures to show me who He is and that He is grace.   He reminded me that He showed up in love through 2 little children, Jayden and Brooklyn.  God gives grace and we often miss it, because we're looking through our own clouded eye sight.  I'm surprised by God's grace.  God has used Sanfilippo to tenderize my heart, and to show me what grace looks like.  He's allowed me to see and to be drawn to the broken places.  Life isn't about getting it all right,  putting all the pieces together nicely, it's more about allowing God to take the broken parts and then He pours Himself into those broken places.  He has shown me way more of who He is through the pain than He ever could have in the easy and good things of this life.  So I'm grateful that God has given me this new language, the language of grace.   I ask  that God will continue to deepen me and grow me into His likeness.  I know He will, using Jayden and Brooklyn to remind me, to remind me of the grace of God. 

Blessings of praying!

I've been wanting to write, but I stopped believing that I had anything to say.  But God keeps reminding me of whose I am.  By God's grace, He reminds me that He is enough for me.  I often think, I don't feel Him, hear Him, see Him, sense Him, but it's in that moment that I realize I just have to BELIEVE HIM.  I have to believe that He is!  When I can believe that He is, it's then God says you're enough for me, and I am enough for you.  

It seems my life is about listening mostly, sometimes sharing, and a lot of praying.  I don't feel that I pray enough, but when I do pray, I feel filled to over flowing.  I used to think that the power was in my prayer, but I realize the power is in the one who hears my prayers.  It has nothing to do with me, it has everything to do with Him.  I'm thankful for the prayers and for the one who hears them.  It's when I pray that I'm changed, maybe the circumstances don't change.  But I'm the one who is changed.  That's the gift.  I love that gift. I had parents who prayed faithfully everyday.  I probably didn't appreciate those prayers when I was young.  Now I appreciate those prayers like never before.  I sometimes wonder if God has stored up all those prayers for my life today.  So today I'm thankful for the prayers.  The prayers of a righteous man availeth much.  So I pray, Lord avail much!  He does. He will.

The sun rays were dancing across the water like diamonds glittering!  Reminding me of treasures He gives. The treasures of a view to remember.  A view to His heart.  A beautiful gift!

Treasures of abundance!

He leads me beside still waters and He restores my soul!  

What an awesome God, He knows what we need before we even ask.  As I sit here and look at a view that is too beautiful for words, I'm reminded of this verse in Psalm 23 that He leads me besides still waters and not only does He lead me to the beautiful still waters, He restores my soul in the process.  What a gift that is! 

I was enjoying the still waters from my raft the other day and I watched the waters quietly rippling as the sun rays danced across the wide open waters, reminding me of diamonds dancing and gleaming across the lake.  It was a view to remember.   The view is God given and a gift to open.  I'm grateful this week for the view.  He sometimes gives us a view to remember.  A view to His heart.  I know and realize His ways are not my ways, His thoughts are not my thoughts.  But precious are His views when we take the moment to enjoy them. 

I've been reminded lately that just like the diamonds dancing across the water, the treasures of God's provisions, His love, His view are like opening a box of abundance.  Abundant treasures.  I'm learning the treasures often come in different ways, different boxes.  I've found treasures in the darkness.  I found treasures this week dancing across the waters.  The treasures of allowing God to deepen my heart and deepen my walk with Him.  Deepen my intimacy with a loving, living Father.   Thank you Jesus for your abundance.  Knowing Him is the abundant life. 

Colossians 2:2-3 ~ My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

Ephesians 3:20 ~ Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.

In the grip of grace!

I was enjoying a quiet sit on a raft kind of day yesterday.  I was laying in a raft on Table Rock Lake, soaking up some sun rays along with some quiet moments.  As I was floating around I decided to tie myself to the dock, so that I wouldn't just float away and end up on the other side of the lake somewhere.   I gripped on to a rope that was hanging nearby.  As I gripped this rope, I found myself thinking about how I grip onto Christ, that this rope was somehow my lifeline to Him.  When the waves would come and rock my raft I hung on tighter.  I found this as a metophor for life as well.  But as I was gripping, I heard God break through into my thoughts and He said you don't have to worry, I'm gripping onto you much tighter than you are gripping onto me. He reminded me that it's not my grip that counts, but His grip that holds me.  I'm in the grip of His grace, His love, His hold on me.  What a great place to be, when your life raft seems to be floating away somewhere into obscurity.  You wonder during the hard moments, if you matter at all to God.  You wonder if all that you've done and or prayed for, if God even heard those cries.  He does and He continues to hear.  Thankfully it's often in the wilderness places that He shows Himself faithful.   Maybe it's the wilderness that He uses to remind us that He's got a tighter grip on us than we could ever have on Him.