Mentoring: Am I qualified?

Have you ever thought about mentoring someone?  Have you wondered if you have what it takes?  Did you realize that whether you know it or not, you are mentoring and you are being mentored.  

The good news is there is no wrong or right way.  Best of all, there is no formula.

Often for me, someone spoke into my life over a period of time.    Then on occasion it was just one conversation that was life changing.  

So ive been thinking about how mentoring has changed my heart, I remember as a young wife and mom, I was blessed to have several women around me who wisely and graciously spoke into my life.   

It was not programmed, it was mostly natural and organic.  I'm sure they didn't even know they were mentoring.  I guess when I was growing up, we didn't use the mentoring word like we do today.   

It was unstructured.   It was good.  But at times I longed for more.  

Now that I'm older I see younger women who are much like I was.   Often struggling to live well, love well and do their best to rise to the occasions.   I really understand.  

But I admit I tend to question my ability to walk with others.  Do I have what it takes?  

Can I walk with someone when I've never walked their walk?   When I've never experienced their kind of pain? 

When I can't relate to their struggle or situation? 

The answer I believe is yes.  

Even in the midst of your "not knowing".  Even in the midst of your own pain.  

It's a big yes. 

I love mentoring, loving and speaking into young women today.  Living life, loving in spite of.   I don't have to have answers.  Because quite frankly I dont.  I just try to listen well.  The opportunities come to speak into their hearts, often when I'm at my worst and least expect it.  

I've realized that mentoring is really about loving.  

So I ask myself am I qualified? 

You are qualified:

when you're humble. 

when you stumble. 

when you're a servant.  

when you're  broken, 

when you're listening. 

when you're not enough. 

when your heart is open. 

when you question yourself. 

when you love broken people. 

when you feel you can't relate. 

When you step out in faith.  

When you believe God is working behind the scenes. 

When you believe God is big.  

When you believe God can do extraordinary things.  

When you trust in His abilities not your own.   

It's not about me and what I desire for someone else.  But what does God want for them?

He provides the growth and the wisdom and the direction.  I'm just his gardener.  I may plant or I may water.  But God does the growing.  It's his job.  And its in His timing.  I'm thankful for that.  

There are times I may feel that I fhaven't come close to getting it right.  But it's in that place that God reminds me.   I'm refining you.   

So don't be discouraged.  

He takes your act of love and obedience and He sometimes passes it through the fire.  He says I'm deepening you.  I'm extending your roots, so they can go deeper still.   

All He asks is that our focus to be on Him. 

So today I'm grateful to those lives that I've been able to speak into and to many women who continue to speak into my life.   They have played the roll of mentor to me even when they didn't know.  What a gift we give each other.   

We need both, to be mentored and to 

mentor.  It's a beautiful lifestyle.  

So go love and mentor someone.  They will thank you later.  So will Jesus.  

1 Corinthians 3:7

So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow.

A few of my mentors!  We have been meeting for over a decade.  For that im grateful.  They are My hallelujahs! 

Were you brave or did you cry?

I am ignited by stories and journeys and paths.  I love the ones that are different. I appreciate people who are not afraid to live brave.  To live inside out.  But I find I'm often fearful. 

Sometimes when I write, my inner critic comes to the surface.  I start to write, but then I question that thought.  Don't write that.  I fear.  

Writing I've heard is a place to bleed.   So I sometimes bleed my thoughts.  Thankful I have thoughts to bleed. 

Somedays I have way more questions than answers.  The answers don't come like I want them to.  But I love that God is using the broken parts of my life along with the parts that are somewhat put together.  

My 3 year old granddaughter asked me a question the other day.   She said "Ama, were you brave or did you cry?  I think maybe Ellie was learning her own lessons on being brave.  But she was also teaching me.  

It made me look at my steps of faith.  My steps of courage.  When we enter onto Jesus path we find that it's mostly opposite of what we've probably thought.  

When I think I deserve an "I'm sorry" Jesus says "just forgive......seventy times  seven."  Really. That's a lot.  

When I want to hear a "thank you."  He says wake up each day with a grateful heart anyway.  It's ok if you never hear those words. 

I remember as a stay at home mom.   I longed to hear the words "your doing a great job.  You are raising awesome kids!    You can do it."  

I guess a cheerleader would have been great on those days that seemed to never end.  Those days of doubt and fear that I'm messing them up.  

But that didn't always happen.  No cheerleader showed up at my front door.  At least not at the moments I thought I needed one. 

It takes courage every day.  Were you brave or did you cry?   As we talked, Ellie and I, we realized its ok if you cry.  You're still brave!  Maybe being brave and courageous look different than we thought. 

Maybe it's about waiting patiently.  Maybe it's finding grace in the dark.  Maybe it's about seeing the small graces that inhance our lives every day. 

Maybe it's listening to a little child who asks a thousands questions.  Maybe it's being ok when I don't get what I think I deserve.  

And maybe it's about being someone's cheerleader. When they least expect it.  

Psalm 27:14Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous.  Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.

I pray, "Lord, let us walk with courage.  Let us live inside out like you.  Let us wait patiently for you."

Ellie.  My little teacher.