The color of grace

I don't always understand what God is doing!   But I'm so glad that He shows Himself to us when we least deserve it.  Grace flows into our lives in unexpected ways.   

Beautiful Jayden and Brooklyn were born with a rare genetic disorder called Sanfilippo Syndrome.  It is so rare that there has been no cure or treatment.  They were given this diagnosis 5 years ago and it significantly shortens their lives.   It is in this place I have sought after the grace of God.   Constantly looking for beautiful hues of grace or occasionally clinging to the shadows of gray.   

 God has allowed me to witness His grace through visuals of brilliant hues of color.  Sometimes, it's in my granddaughter Brooklyn's eyes that sparkle like water dancing on the ocean shore, it's there I see grace.   I see the color of grace when I watch her playing pretend, when she sings twinkle twinkle little star.   Then when she wants to sing it again and again.  When she's not feeling her best Gods grace shines even brighter!  Gods love deepens me and we share the grace place.  She reminds me to look deeper and allows my faith to be stretched.  It's in that moment I'm overwhelmed by His sufficiency.  

I see His grace breaking through the surface of my heart when I share moments with Jayden.  He offers me an adoring smile and then takes my soul to that grace place where his laughter consumes the space we share.   Grace is God's to give and for us to receive.  Jayden is my gentle reminder that God has so much more grace to give then we can ever  imagine.  

It's often though,  I see grace in the shadows and shades of gray.  Our lives are often spent in the shadows of his grace.   The shade or shadow has been my hiding place, a place of shelter.   Sometimes it portrayed as dark and gray,  but maybe it's in the shadows where he often calls us to be, to land.  The grace place, where we find protection from the heavy storms.  It's in the shadow of the almighty where we experience peace and where we find rest.   It's the wonder of this place that renders me speechless .  

I'm blessed and even overwhelmed when I abide in the grace of God whether its in the  shadow or hues of color.  I see the hand of a majestic God reaching down directing our steps allowing us to see His grace in new ways.   Thank you Jesus for showing me.  Thank you Brooklyn and Jayden for being a reminder of the color of grace in our lives.   

As I write this, we are learning of new advances in finding a cure for this disease.   We praise God that He continues to show Himself in the lives of these children.  Please pray as we seek Him in funding a new advancement in Gene therapy.    A cure for this disease.     

 Psalm 91:1 
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. 

2 Timothy 1:9

He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time

James 4:6

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.

My Easter Pics

What is she doing here?

I remember hearing those words....."What is she doing here?"

 I was in the 7th grade and those words were directed at me.  My friend had asked me and another friend to come help her be a teachers aid during our lunch.  As our teacher approached us he had an unhappy look on his face.  That's when those words spilled out of his mouth "what is she doing here" and my heart sank.  I knew in that moment I wasn't accepted.  I was rejected.  

That was a hard moment for a shy, awkward 7th grader.  I was a typical 12 year old girl looking for acceptance.

 I would rehearse those words over and over.  I would hear them echoing in the hallways of my heart for many years. They would adhere like glue to my soul ....!   I couldn't remove those words, they would linger in my mind.  They would hang dangling like moss on a tree.   Chanting "you aren't enough!"   "What are you doing here?"

 Negative words can have a crippling affect on us.   What a reminder that words do make a difference.   They give us value or take it away.  They do tremendous damage and can leave us feeling insignificant.

 There are many moments I wish I could put in reverse, the words I've used.  There are really no second chances once the words have tumbled out, it's done.  I'm still learning, but I want to use words that will bring healing, that will encourage, that will uplift, that will inspire and give life.  That's what God's word does in our lives and in our hearts.

He resurrects the pain, but then covers it with a gentle healing balm.  He uses those negative places in our lives to grow us deeper into the heart of God.  We can only grow from the place of hurt and pain when we allow God to use it for His glory.

He is purposeful in our lives when we allow Him to freely search our souls.   I know now what I'm doing here.  God has purpose and intention.  I'm thankful today for those words, although painful then, they are a wonderful reminder to me of the mighty hand of God in my life.

The desire I have today is to use words differently, to build, to restore, to refresh, to bring value, hope and inspiration.  Words.....are powerful.   My prayer is that God would continue to use my words to glorify Himself through blogging and the searching of my soul.   Praise God for  "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks."  The abundance of words!  They are sweeter than honey in a honey comb!

Psalm 19:4
May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart
    be pleasing in your sight,
    Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 119:103   

How sweet are your words to my tastes sweeter than honey to my mouth!

Proverbs 16:24 

Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

The table of grace!

Sometimes I find God calling me to the table of Grace.  There is something in me that is always looking for the grace place.  When I was a little girl, my family would eat dinner together every evening around the 5:00 hour.  This was in the 60's and I would imagine most families in my neighborhood were clamoring around their dinner table as well.   We would often say our memorized prayer all together as a family.  "God is great God is good let us thank him for this food.  Amen."  It became a common prayer, that quite honestly lost most of it's meaning I suppose.  But I learned at a young age that the table was the place of grace.  That table of grace would eventually take on new meaning.   Somehow grace became more than just a short prayer that we prayed before dinner.  The table of grace is where I long to dine at now.  This table may be messy and often kind of sticky, but a welcome place.   It occasionally becomes complicated and cluttered.  As my faith  grows my table of grace grows as well.  It's in the heart that I notice grace changing me.  I long to sit and linger there to savor every moment.   It looks different now than it did in the 60's.  But I love this table.  I know it is often hard to understand this grace place.   Sometimes we understand it through painful moments.  Moments that God allows in our lives for His purposes.  Our hearts break at times at this table,  It breaks for those things that make no sense from a simple understanding.  Thankfully God uses this place to teach us, to change us and allows us to grow, so that we can offer this grace to others.  He serves us a banquet of grace.   We can be assured that there will be more served where there's more grace required and it's always enough.  It's at this table we're all equal.   We can all come to the table with what and who we are.   All of our tables look different and are uniquely designed to serve us right where we are.  I leave full, but long for more grace filled appointments, more cups of grace.  I know there will be many more!  Praise God, for His grace table is sufficient.  More grace please!

2 Corinthians 12:9

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

     2 Corinthians 4:15

All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God.

Romans 5:2

through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God.