Treasure of Brokenness

I've been thinking about brokenness and how God calls it sacrifice.  He calls it good.  I've found that God has so much for us to learn when we're willing to be broken for Him.  I was reading Max Lucado's devotion this morning, and it was a wonderful reminder of what is really important.  It helped me get perspective.  I often lose perspective in the midst of the the hullabaloo, the dirty laundry, the clutter, and the awesome, craziness of life.  But when we pay attention to the one who walked on water and the one who comes with the soft sounds of sandaled fee, we get perspective.  I desire to let Him lead me especially when I'm in the fog.  My momentary sufferings are so small when I think about His brokenness!

Sufferings of His Broken Heart

by Max Lucado
Go with me for a moment to witness what was perhaps the foggiest night in history. The scene is very simple; you’ll recognize it quickly. A grove of twisted olive trees. Ground cluttered with large rocks. A low stone fence. A dark, dark night.
Now, look into the picture. Look closely through the shadowy foliage. See that person? See that solitary figure? What’s he doing? Flat on the ground. Face stained with dirt and tears. Fists pounding the hard earth. Eyes wide with a stupor of fear. Hair matted with salty sweat. Is that blood on his forehead?
That’s Jesus. Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.
Maybe you’ve seen the classic portrait of Christ in the garden. Kneeling beside a big rock. Snow-white robe. Hands peacefully folded in prayer. A look of serenity on his face. Halo over his head. A spotlight from heaven illuminating his golden-brown hair.
Now, I’m no artist, but I can tell you one thing. The man who painted that picture didn’t use the gospel of Mark as a pattern. Look what Mark wrote about that painful night, he used phrases like these: “Horror and dismay came over him.” “My heart is ready to break with grief.” “He went a little forward and threw himself on the ground.”
Does this look like the picture of a saintly Jesus resting in the palm of God? Hardly. Mark used black paint to describe this scene. We see an agonizing, straining, and struggling Jesus. We see a “man of sorrows.” (Isaiah 53:3 NASB) We see a man struggling with fear, wrestling with commitments, and yearning for relief.
We see Jesus in the fog of a broken heart.
The writer of Hebrews would later pen, “During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death.” (Hebrews 5:7 NIV)
My, what a portrait! Jesus is in pain. Jesus is on the stage of fear. Jesus is cloaked, not in sainthood, but in humanity.
The next time the fog finds you, you might do well to remember Jesus in the garden. The next time you think that no one understands, reread the fourteenth chapter of Mark. The next time your self-pity convinces you that no one cares, pay a visit to Gethsemane. And the next time you wonder if God really perceives the pain that prevails on this dusty planet, listen to him pleading among the twisted trees.
The next time you are called to suffer, pay attention. It may be the closest you’ll ever get to God. Watch closely. It could very well be that the hand that extends itself to lead you out of the fog is a pierced one.

Happy birthday Justin!

Today Justin is 31.  Hmmmm.  Where did those years go?  My first son.....a precious gift.  I remember when the doctor said it's a boy.....Ken yelled out!  Alright!  We've been forever blessed!  I'm amazed everyday how God continues to use Justin.  In the good times and the hard times, we marvel at Justin's life.  He is a special man, who is living in difficult circumstances but he's doing it with passion, dignity and the grace of God.  Isn't that what it's all about! 

Thank you Justin for blessing our lives for 31 years.  You contnue to model and remind me what is really important in life.  Have a great birthday!  I love you! 

Seeking treasures, seeking Him

The other night, Jayden and Brooklyn were hanging out with us. I had just fed them dinner and gave them a bath.   Brooklyn was getting sleepy, so I grabbed her soft pink blanket to cuddle with.  Jayden was watching us getting comfortable on the couch.  He decided to join us,so he crawled up and sat by us on the couch. (that just never happens)  He pulled some of the pink blanket on him so that he was covered up too.  Before I knew it,  Jayden had curled up and fallen asleep on my shoulder and Brooklyn had fallen asleep in my arms.  What a special moment for me.....a moment I won't soon forget.  They looked so beautiful, sound asleep.  It was a moment of sheer delight to see them so quiet and still.  I know those moments don't happen often, but I'm glad that I was able to enjoy those few moments of sweetness.  I believe God desires sweet moments with us.  Those moments are gifts to us.  I believe He longs for those moments with His children.  I so often miss the moment of His sweet presence in my busyness.  But as I seek Him I find He waits and offers generous amounts of His perfect presence, another treasure I have found in the darkness.  As I've been seeking the treasure of His presence He graciously gives me what I need.   Continue to seek treasures! 


Romans 11:33  Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways!

Gentleness ~ a treasure that's rich in humility!

I've been amazed at what God has been showing me lately.  I've discovered a new treasure called Gentleness....As I've been studying this past year the fruits of the spirit, I'm learning what it looks like to live beyond myself.  It's been very challenging, encouraging, crazy, exciting, stressful, meaningful, inspiring, all of these and more.  I realize more and more that God doesn't expect us to get it right, to be right, but to be faithful, to have an open heart.  He does the work. The 7th fruit of the spirit is gentleness, I thought I knew what gentleness meant, a gentle touch, a softness.  Gentleness in the greek is praotes.  It means humility, submission, teachability.  I learned that gentleness bows in submission.  It's the humble part of gentleness that bows to someone.  That's where it gets challenging.  Somehow, I don't really want to bow to anyone but Jesus.  But God has a plan for us and it's often with humility we accept His work in us.  Beth Moore says "gentleness  is an outward expression of feeling, but an inward grace of the soul, calmness toward God in particular.  It is the acceptance of God's dealing with us, considering them as good."

I love words like grace, gentleness and calmness.  Who doesn't want an inward grace of the soul?  When our hearts are open and ready, He comes and fills us with His gentleness that we can be prepared to live beyond ourselves.

Psalm 18:35
You have given me the shield of your salvation,
and your right hand supported me,
and your gentleness made me great.

Becoming a comforter

I received a beautiful email from my sweet and dear friend Audrey.  She made a beautiful smilebox greeting card for me.....it was full of comfort and love.  What a unique and priceless gift.  She reminded me of some words that my mom shared with her to comfort her when she was grieving a tremendous loss.  She said, That God doesn't comfort us to make us comfortable but to make us comforters. 

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Praise to the God of All Comfort

 ³ Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴ who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

So a great reminder to me in processing through another loss, that God has great purpose and uses loss in our lives so that we are equipped to comfort others when they are in need.  He seems to be equipping me again and again. I can choose to say thank you Jesus for showing me and teaching me to become a comforter. It seems to be a natural flow for some.  It doesn't always come naturally for others.  But God does the equipping when we have open hearts to hear Him speak.  I pray for an open heart for God to do His work in me.  To do the equipping, the teaching so I can be an encourager to someone else, like Audrey was for me and my mom was for her, back 20 some years ago. 

 

 

Gladys a loving legacy of faith and family!

It seems we've had our share of sadness lately.  I wonder what God is thinking.  When is it enough?   We've now in one year, lost 2 family members and a severe diagnosis for 2 grand babies.  I'm really tired of loss.  But I am learning through each one, that God is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.  I learn to cling to Him in these times and cling to His word.  I'm learning that God doesn't waste our pain, our sorrow, or our loss. God uses these to make us more like Him.  Each situation that leaves us in pain brings us closer to God when we let him use it in our life in new ways.

My mother in law Gladys Boyce passed away on Saturday March 12th.  She was ready to go, I know she longed for heaven.  We will miss her, she lived a wonderful life.  She had a wonderful gift of family surrounding her.  She never wavered in her faith.  She underlined in her Bible Psalm 100 and I have been looking at that scripture this week.  It has comforted my soul and I'm so glad she left that for us.  She focused on the goodness of God, even in the light of adversity, struggle and pain.

Psalm 100

A psalm. For giving grateful praise. ¹ Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.
 ² Worship the LORD with gladness;
   come before him with joyful songs.
³ Know that the LORD is God.
   It is he who made us, and we are his^[a];
   we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
 ⁴ Enter his gates with thanksgiving
   and his courts with praise;
   give thanks to him and praise his name.
⁵ For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
   his faithfulness continues through all generations. 


She certainly has left a lasting legacy of love, faith and family.  What a wonderful gift she leaves. Although we are never ready to let someone go.  It is such a shock to have to say goodbye.  But our goodbye is only for a short time.  Thankfully heaven is getting more and more precious to me all the time.  We love you Gladys.  We will miss you! 

through the song of a little boy!

I was listening to Jayden the other day when he was playing down stairs.  I was upstairs and I heard him singing.  It was so sweet as he sang his song.  He sang about his Daddy and Bubba mostly.  But it was perfectly in tune and as I listened I was reminded of the verse in Zephaniah 3:17 ~ The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save.  He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love.  He will rejoice over you with singing.  I wondered as I was listening to Jayden sing, that maybe God was rejoicing over us with singing, and maybe using the sweet song that Jayden was singing to do just that.  It seemed to me that verse made more sense that day as it came alive through the voice of a little boy.  It seemed to really change my heart.  I often wonder how God can so simply and beautifully speak into our heart and show us that He takes great delight in us, in me.  That He would use Jayden's sweet words to remind me.  As I sat their and heard him sing about Daddy and Bubba, I heard in my heart the words Abba Father.  What a gift that was for my broken heart.  That God must really love me to show me so simply and illustrate it so beautifully.  Abba Father really loves me, He really loves us!  He is still mighty to save.  He delights in us and he rejoices over us with singing!  It's not always the way we think.  Often when we aren't expecting it, He shows up.  Maybe in the voice of a little child!  Thank you Jayden.  Continue to sing your song!  It's beautiful to Him and to me!